Marriage

Some lines :

Lovers, when they marry, face
Eternity with touching grace,
Complacent at being fated,
Never to be separated.

The bride is always pretty, the groom
A lucky man. The darkened room
Roars out the joys of flesh and blood
The use of nakedness is good.

Why should I ruin the mystery,
By harping on the suffering rest,
Myself a frequent wedding guest.

- Nissim Ezekiel

July 13th, 2008

- Distressful Homonyns

Since for me now you have no warmth to spare
I sense I must adopt a sane and spare

Philosophy to ease a restless state
Fuelled by this uncaring. It will state

A very meagre truth: love like the rest
Of our emotions, sometimes needs a rest.

Happiness, too, no doubt; and so, why even
Hope that 'the course of true love' could run even?

By Vikram Seth

She Dwelt among the Untrodden Ways

She dwelt among the untrodden ways
Beside the springs of Dove,
A maid whom there were none to praise
And very few to love:

A violet by a mossy stone
Half hidden from the eye!
—Fair as a star, when only one
Is shining in the sky.

She lived unknown, and few could know
When Lucy ceased to be;
But she is in her grave, and, oh,
The difference to me!

- William Wordsworth

Let Me Not To The Marriage Of True Minds

Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments. Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O no! it is an ever-fixed mark
That looks on tempests and is never shaken;
It is the star to every wandering bark,
Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.

Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bending sickle's compass come:
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out even to the edge of doom.
If this be error and upon me proved,
I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

- William Shakespeare

To Knot or Not?

This post is a borrowed one, or should I say bartered? Exchanged in lieu of an earliar one lended to a very dear friend. But since charity is not my middle name, I decided to lurk around and pounce on any chance of redeeming the favour I had done. And to state the obvious, I actually got my chance!

But considering my penchant for postscripts and asides ( thanks to the many Shakespearean works that I was made to learn by rote, and which I gradually fell in love with ) there have been some minor and major changes in the plot. (For one, the title has been changed.) Sorry Smruti. Well here goes the newer version.

BRIDE WANTED

Wanted convent educated, tall, fair, slim, homely girl. Well, every time somebody starts the topic of marriage, I can’t help but recall the above headline that dots the matrimonial columns of weekend newspapers. And I dread the day when I will be reduced to such a headline…the possibilities are enormous and I say a small prayer every Sunday, when I read the classifieds and don’t see my name or description featured in it.

It’s become a daily chore now. Well almost. To avoid the topic of marriage. Invariably someone or the other brings up the topic and somewhere down the line, everybody deems me the unfortunate victim - someone who has been passed on and will never know the pleasure of married life. And guess what...in the same sentence they will crib about their own spouse and the many pitfalls of married life, but hey that’s another topic, they say.

Right from near and distant relatives to well meaning and not so well meaning friends, almost all have the same concern - to see me married. So that they can all say in chorus "Another one bites the dust". It’s as if all the married people in the world are raging a silent war against the single population and they will not rest unless we join the fraternity, unless we pledge alliance to the secret society of unrealized expectations and everlasting nagging.

But now my friends have taken a different approach. One wants me to jot down the qualities that I need in my man so that she can go about looking for one, and a critical search on the many matrimonial websites is on. But she insists on the list, blissfully engrossed in her trousseau shopping. Now...well, my dear friend, if you so insist...here's the list. But let me clarify...My Love Don't Cost a Thing...Well...Really! Here's the tentative list :

1. Should love me, for all that I am and am not.

2. Money (Will make do with a decent amount)
3. Should be witty

4. Body (A reasonable physique will do. No six packs please!)

5. Have a political opinion (if it matches mine, that’s great…but even if it doesn’t-no problem, but should have one… most people I meet don’t have any political opinion of their own. Actually!)

6. Read books…fiction, non fiction, anything...(so that I can borrow and gift him some…it’s the bestest gift idea! But then again, no second hands please...And mind you, here I speak from experience!)

7. Should be passionate about travelingl…Andamans, North East, Backwaters, Ladakh, Rajasthan, Macchu Pichhu...infact....anywhere..!

8. Should have the time and money to go on such trips with me. (Well, if he's busy, I'll adjust. Just his money would do.)

9. Should be in love with both the sea and the mountains

10. Should not be protective or possessive about me

11. Should not talk to me for more than 2 hours in a day. ( And less, if I am NOT in the mood. Random phone calls are a strict no no. And Please, no enquiries about my diet regime, breakfast, lunch, dinner, et al.)

12. Should not be messy
13. Should not throw things on the road
14. Should not encourage beggars
15. Pet peeves would be allowed, but only once in a while.

16. Should be independent
17. Should not be mama’s boy
18. Should have at least one major relationship (That would take the pressure off me)

19. Should be active (one lazybones is enough, read me)
20. Should be practically impractical
21. Should be romantic without being mushy

22. Should love all my my friends

23. Should be willing to be part of my hare brained enterprises
24. Should manage to surprise me
25. Should be willing to yell at me once in a while (once in a while, I repeat)

26. Should be able to spend time with me without talking
27. Should be able to understand my moods
28. Should be able to understand how much he means to me without me ever saying it.

That's all for now. I know you would say, how considerate. But that's what I am, have always been.

And She Lived Happily Ever After

The story in this post was actually forwarded by a very dear friend. I am posting it here with an added post script, the content of which is entirely my view on the 'other' advantages of singlehood. The story goes:

Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl 'Will you marry me?' The girl said: 'NO!' And the girl lived happily ever after.

She went shopping, dancing, camping, drank martinis, always had a clean house, never had to cook, did whatever the hell she wanted, never argued, didn't get fat, traveled more, had many lovers, didn't save money, and had all the hot water to herself. She went to the theatre, never watched sports, never wore friggin' lacy lingerie, had high self esteem, never cried or yelled, felt and looked fabulous in sweat pants and was pleasant all the time.

Dil Dosti Etc

One always thought - love is two people meeting, falling in love and then living happily ever after. This is one movie that shatters the myth. This is real life. There's nothing called love. Just plain sex. Sex, I repeat, and not love making.

The tagline of the film says - When you are young, you believe, the possibilities are endless...
What possibilities...one wonders after the film...possibilities that you can have as many girls as you want, in a day?

This urban flick, directed by Manish Tiwary, juxtaposes the lives of two university hostellers - Apurv (Imaad Shah), a rich listless guy and, Sanjay Mishra (Shreyas Talpade), an old-fashioned Bihari, aspring to make it big in university politics. It's through their story that the director tries to contrast the liberal outlook with the conservative outlook in our society. Through its ensemble cast, the film explores male bonding, voyeurism, sexual perversion, love and of course, betrayal.

But from a personal point of view, the film centres way too much around sex, sex and more sex...and the climax broke my heart. What a shame. Makes one realize that there’s no dearth of likes of Apurvas around us. What say?

The Road Not Taken

TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference

-- Robert Frost

If You would Say

If you would say -
"You are not good enough"
I would then understand,
and perhaps
nonchalantly move on.

And if you would proclaim
"I am in search of a new game
a fair maiden,
with swaying long hair"
then I'll understand more so
and perhaps say -
I really don't care.

But then if you said
"Me plain bored out of life,
looking for, say
a new emotional strife"
this will amuse me more
and who knows
I may even wish
an abundance of such strifes
to keep you sore.

But then, I would not do that
of course,
have no points to score,
but then
how would you know
you soar to newer strifes,
leaving people sore.

On Some Monologues

Incessant monologues wreck my mind,
But the words come out
In mumbles - incoherent and trite.
To some memories the heart binds
Blanketing, shutting out reason,
It's then that I realise
Wayward is the fancy's flight.